Unpacking the 'Whys'

My uncle is dying of cancer. The whole family went up to the hospital yesterday to see him. We had prepared the boys that uncle Howard would look different. That he was sick and had lost a lot of weight. They shook their heads in agreement, acknowledging that they understood. He had progressed further then we thought and when we walked in it took a moment to see the man under the oxygen tube. But there he was. Mind still intact, he opened his arms wide to greet us. He was still there. Still the same ornery guy we knew. His eyes smiled at the sight of the boys and he pointed to the stroller as he wanted to meet Nora for the first time. I cannot recall many family memories without him in it, always a quiet presence, enjoying the activity. Although his personal life was very private, we all have fond memories of him. He wont be leaving the hospital. Tears have been shed. We told him he is loved.

When we got home I could tell Sam was the most affected by seeing uncle Howard this way. We weren't sure if we even wanted to take the boys, but we felt this time was right. So we did. But I wanted to take the time to unpack his thoughts and his fears. So after the other kids went to bed Sam, dad and I stayed up and talked. Slowly we got to the root of his hesitation to talk. "Will I get sick like uncle Howard?.....could I have caught what he had?" We talked about the difference between getting cancer and having a sore throat. What the disease is. We assured him he could not have caught it. He felt momentarily relieved. Then he began to ask...

"Why do people go away?"
"Will God heal him?"
"Why is there a heaven?"
"Why does uncle Howard and Major have to go away??!"

We held each other and talked. Jed and I shared as much truth and honesty we felt a five year old could handle; death, heaven, sin, separation, salvation, hope. We prayed that God might meet him in his fears and questions. And he assured me he would ask me any questions that came up. He smiled as he promised.

I'm thankful God allows me to do much of the same to Him. That He allows me to sit at His feet and shed hot tears of question and hurt.

Please be in prayer for my aunt Barb as she endures losing a spouse and our uncle Howard as he battles in his last days on this side.

If in Christ we have hope in this life only, we are of all people most to be pitied
-1 Corinthians 15:19-